29 October 2006

Congratulations - Chaplains in schools

From: Pastor Len Guini, FSM Australia
To: julie.bishop@dest.gov.au
Cc: schoolchaplaincy@dest.gov.au
Date: Oct 29, 2006 5:59 PM
Subject: Congratulations - Chaplains in schools

Attn. Hon. Julie Bishop MP
Minister for Education, Science and Training

Dear Minister Bishop
Congratulations on today's announcement of the Chaplains in Schools program and, in particular, the government's commitment of $90 million over three years to fund further exploration of religious values in our schools.

On behalf of Australia's Pastafarian community, I welcome the Prime Minister's assurance that the program will include funding chaplains to undertake work including "assisting students in exploring their spirituality; (and) providing guidance on religious, values and ethical matters".

We in no way seek to make light of the many serious issues faced by our young people. We seek only to congratulate you on your commitment and resolve in devoting taxpayer's money to the active promotion of religion in schools, government and non-government alike.

As you may be aware, Pastafarians believe the world was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. While in the past year we have seen enormous growth in the number of Australians professing our faith, and greater interest yet in our beliefs and Holy writings, we continue to face a gap in awareness about our faith among the general community.

In particular, we are saddened that increasing numbers of school students are being taught about the Christian God in their science classrooms, but they have yet to be taught about the other main explanation for the creation of the universe: the intervention of the FSM, and the beneficient nudges of His Noodly Appendages.

Perhaps the placement of government-funded Pastafarian chaplains in schools may go some way towards rectifying this gap in their knowledge. I would be only too pleased to answer the call, and I'm sure Pastor Al Dente would be with me on this point, if the FSM should nudge us gently in this direction.

Given the regrettable but continuing discrimination faced by the Pastafarian community in this country, it is my hope that, in the event that a school community applies for funding for appointment of an FSM chaplain, your new Reference Group and officers of your Department will not attempt to prevent the appointment. After all, as the Prime Minister noted, the "choice of chaplaincy services, including the religious affiliation and denomination, is entirely a decision for the school community".

When it comes to our schools, and indeed the Australian community as a whole, we humbly pledge to put the 'pasta' back into 'pastoral care'.

Yours most sincerely
Pastor Len Guini

Durum Cathedral
Church of the FSM


At 8:21 pm, Anonymous Pastor Len said...

Ramen Pastor Len, only the most stony hearted zealot could fail to be moved by your oratory.

yours in sauce

Pastor Al

PS can I borrow your oratory tomorrow night, mine is in for a service

At 7:48 pm, Anonymous Nick said...

Gosh. I was previously opposed to this program because I considered it overt religious discrimination, but I feel that the FSM has shown me the light. This is indeed the perfect opportunity to spread the word!

At 7:55 pm, Anonymous Al Fabet-Supe said...

I have finally found my church! I have had difficulty locating such a religion as I live in South Africa, I feel now that awareness has been made of the Pastafarians (thank you Australia) My new delema is how do I become a Paster.
Please let me know
Al Fabet-Supe

At 12:27 pm, Anonymous Adrian said...

In the recent census, and with some pride, I noted under 'Religion, Other' that I be a High Pirate in the Church of Pastafarianism. Our sauce is spreading...

At 1:05 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm pleased to announce the inception of the FSM Mafia.

Don't be alarmed - no illegal practices here (strictly speaking), we merely aim to exploit the beliefs of the infidels to raise money for our cause.

It's high thyme we accepted our duties as FSM believers and advocates and really pushed to raise awareness (and funds) for our campaign of Pastafarian Awareness.

Yours in Saucedness,

Boss Cailoa
FSM Mafia

At 7:39 pm, Anonymous Tell said...

It pleases me to know someone is taking care for the reputation of It on your piece of land.
To get the local admins into proper work is very well done :-).

At 12:54 am, Blogger Alex said...

I am a recent convert to the FSM. I am a mere cabin boy on the great serving bowl that is the universe.

I had been fooled by the path of those heathen Jedi Knights. They're evil mind-tricks had clouded my ability to sense His Noodly Appendages.

I just want to congratulate you all at FSM Oz for your the fine work. I will regularly visit this safehaven of sanity, in the otherwise confused world of the ID and Jedi.

Yours Saucily

At 11:55 pm, Blogger Pastor Len Guini said...

Some replies to our growing flock:

** Al Fabet-Supe - welcome to the fold, and good to hear the Noodly appendages are stretching across the ocean to you in South Africa. If you wish to become a Pastor in our church (some say Pasta), you can study FSM lore for years, meditating on the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, posting witty comments on the FSM forum (see: http://www.venganza.org/index.htm) and reflecting while you eat pasta every Friday. Or you can simply declare yourself a Pastor and do all of the above things afterwards. We're sure you'll do a fine job - something about your name tells me you're on the right track. Oh, and let us know how you go.

** Adrian, yea you will indeed be blessed with his Nooldy touch, especially as you have a picture of Pirate Jack up on your website: http://www.pureandapplied.net/. Harrr, I can feel ye turnin' the mangy tide of global warmin' as I be speakin'.

** Boss Cailoa - um, welcome. Is that a pepper grinder in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?

** Tell, yes, hello and welcome. I'm sure the FSM understands you.

** Alex, welcome to the fold. As a cabin boy on the great FSM pirate ship, I'm sure we'll find something for you to do.

Pastor Len

At 2:25 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The one thing I have a problem with in the email is use of psuedonyms, anything official should use real names.

By the way, is this in any way an official branch of the church?

~ Quolnok

At 7:53 pm, Blogger Pastor Len Guini said...

~ Quolnok, is there something about Julie Bishop I should know?

And yes, this branch of the church is as official as they come.

Pastor Len

At 1:48 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

that was not funny

At 5:22 pm, Blogger Pastor Len Guini said...

Anonymous, you're right it's no joke. We are highly serious about bringing Australians the touch of His Noodly appendage.

And my you feel his Noodly touch too.

Pastor Len

At 10:30 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I cant wait for this abs page to be updated to see the growth in Pastafarians ! woo woo !


good wishes to his noodlyness.

At 8:41 pm, Blogger Robert Wiblin said...


Pastafarian religious instruction in schools

Dear Pastor Len Guini of the Australian Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster,

Congratulations on your fine website providing Pastafarian religious instruction at http://noodlynation.blogspot.com. I fondly remember the regular Christian religious instruction provided by Gideons Australia and local Christian churches to year 8 and year 10 students during my time at a public high school in South Australia. Gideons Australia kindly gave Christian Bibles to all student so that they could further explore Christian beliefs in their own time. I believe, as I'm sure you do, that it is important for all students to be provided with many different perspectives on spirituality so that they can make an educated choice about which religion is right for them.

Last year I was nudged towards Pastafarianism by the Flying Spaghetti Monster's Noodly Appendage and have come to appreciate His wisdom. As a new convert to today's fastest growing carbohydrate-based religion I would very much like to be able to discuss my beliefs with students at my old high school, Glenunga International, and others in my local area. As local Christian Churches are permitted to regularly present to students I certainly trust that South Australian public schools will be willing to grant our alternative belief system the equal time it deserves. I am sure students will very much enjoy learning about the Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster including the Eight I Really Wish You Didn'ts and the controversy regarding the origin of carbohydrate-based life forms. Those who request it will be granted free copies of the Holy Gospels to consider at a later date.

I hope to prepare a brief presentation on Pastafarianism with some fellow converts in similar style to that of the Gideons organisation. When it is finished I will be glad to send you a copy for you as Pastor to check for factual accuracy.

However, in order to achieve all of this I will need support from the Australia Church of the FSM to meet any public school regulations and ensure that we are recognised as a legitimate church. If you are aware of the system by which churches apply to give presentations to students it would be wonderful if you could forward that information to me as well as any other advice on the issue. You may also have an estimate of the number of adherents of Pastafaranism in Australia.

In the hope that we and many more Australians will continue to be touched by His Noodly Appendage.


At 9:20 am, Anonymous Chaz said...

it is fantastic that you are doing this.
the general public must know of our god.
Many more must be touched by his noodly appendage.
With you in sauce
A fellow believer


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